Just a couple of short weeks ago, my son and I took our first trip together.  At that time, I was full of uncertainty as we traveled for the first time as mother and son alone together.  I wondered how his interview would go at the school he was so excited to attend.  I wondered what it would be like for the two of us to travel, just the two of us, together.

It was a success.  He and I had a blast spending time together in the city.  There wasn’t one moment of awkwardness between us.  I’m not sure what I was even worried about.  Of course, we enjoyed each other’s company.  Why wouldn’t we?  As for the school, we were both impressed beyond our expectations.  The introductory interview went well, and he was asked to come back with essays in hand a week later.  He traveled alone to the city for the second round of interviews and a week later was accepted into his “dream” school.  Now the reality is here.  Now the changes begin.  He will be starting classes in less than a month, and he needs to find a place to live in Chicago.

Tomorrow Andrew and I are returning to the city for a whirlwind two-day trip.  We are hoping to accomplish a great deal on this trip.  We are meeting with a realtor to begin the search, and hopefully select, an apartment.  We are also going to try to master, in the way only a country bumpkin hillbilly can, the Chicago mass transit system.  Keep this in mind, the only bus that either he or I have ridden on is a yellow school bus driven by a friendly local retired man as he took our respective classes on school field trips.  If any of you are in Chicago tomorrow, we will be the two people with wide eyes and gaping mouths trying not to look like we’re scared shitless.

While Andrew is thrilled for this opportunity, I know him well enough to also know that he is very apprehensive about the move, and especially about this giant change in his surroundings.  Gosh, being a parent is not easy sometimes.  Yes, he is an adult, but tomorrow he needs a strong parent.  No matter how fearful and unsure I may be, I can’t let him sense my discomfort.  I will need to act as if it is all manageable so that I don’t add to his fears.  I hope I don’t let him down.

Keep us in your thoughts tomorrow.  We’ll get by just fine, but it never hurts to have a few good people wishing you luck!  Andrew and I have crossed many hurdles together in the past.  We have faced things much larger than the city of Chicago.  We beat death together.  The L will be a piece of cake!

4 thoughts on “Scary

  1. Good luck tomorrow. You will both do fine.

    Don’t worry about faking assuredness or confidence for Andrew’s sake. Just be Pam. Being the mom he knows and loves is just fine for him, and if that’s a lady that’s asking a lot of questions of friendly Chicagoans to help navigate the urban jungle, he will greatly admire the joie de vivre of his co-adventurer.

  2. Steve, You’re exactly right!!! I asked questions of the people around us, and the whole thing went very well. By the end of the day, we had conquered our fears AND…..rented an apartment!! 🙂 We are still in the city and having a great time.

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