The last couple of weeks have been a whirlwind. I have missed writing, but I haven’t had time or energy. The worst part was the fact that I have not allowed myself to write. I have had nothing decent to say. I have once again been mired down in frustration, stress, and depression. Work has been a political, back-stabbing fest. People I had once considered friends seem to be going out of their way to trip me up and make my life a bit uncomfortable. Decency and kindness have been in short supply. The past couple of weeks have been topsy turvy and confusing. Mostly, it has seemed as if FRUSTRATION has been around every corner. Continue Reading »
OK, I will admit it. Yesterday I was wallowing in self-pity. I’ve done a pretty good job of wallowing today, too, but I have tried my damnedest to remember that THIS, this self-pity phase, while it is really horrible to live through, is not all there is to life. I have been down before, but I have never given up. Ever. It’s not in me to give up. There is way too much beauty in life for me to ever forget what a privilege it is to be alive.
As I drove back to the office from lunch today, I tried to refocus. I mentally listed one thing after another that make me happy. Yes, many of them are worthless, superficial things. Some of them are big…HUGE. That isn’t what matters. These are all things that remind of the joy in life. These things, little and big, are what make it worth getting up in the morning and continuing to put one foot in front of the other.
Nail Polish. I have a new obsession, and both of my daughters are right on board. We buy nail polish, and more nail polish. It’s not unusual to change shades each day. I only paint my toenails, but they have been colorful this summer. Our new favorite brand is Essie. They have the most fantastic shades. The girls have even gotten me to try shades of green and blue.
8-year-olds. I love 8-year-olds, and I am lucky enough to get to live with one this year. 8-year-olds are wise and innocent all at the same time. They really have life figured out, and they aren’t messed up by the sexual urges and matters of the heart that lie ahead. 8-year-olds are perfect, little human beings.
Caribou Coffee. I love Caribou! Hands down, it is the BEST coffee. If you have never been to Caribou, GO! Try the dark chocolate mint mocha or the raspberry dark chocolate mocha. Ahhhh….. I was a happy camper today, because I finally bought a car magnet. “I Love Coffee.”
My kids. I love having the opportunity to raise my four children. Highs and lows, ups and downs, dirty diapers, dirty words, achievements, laughter, hugs, and smiles. There has never been one moment of regret. They are all so very unique. Such a surprise being a parent has been. I am not necessarily a woman who has always loved being around kids, but my own? Nothing in life could compare to the experience and privilege of raising these children.