Today someone yelled at me. It was at the end of the day. I am sick and exhausted. My energy was already depleted, and the yelling sucked away whatever remained. Even now, hours later, I am shaking. I didn’t deserve to be yelled at. While I spoke in a calm, reserved voice, this person blamed me for causing their lack of control. No. No person deserves to be yelled at, and no person can be the cause of another’s lack of control. Hang up the phone. Walk away. Table the discussion. Mentally healthy adults do not yell…..under any circumstance. Yelling is a selfish, weak, self-absorbed way to handle a difficult situation. Yelling is cowardly. Continue Reading »
Yesterday was National Suicide Awareness Day. A friend’s post on Facebook last night made me aware of the day, but more importantly it reminded me of the lies that depression can tell a person.
“Life is not worth living.”
“I am not loved.”
“I am not good enough.” Continue Reading »
I’m not having the best day. Too many meetings, and another concert tonight. Thank goodness, this is the last one of the season. It rained this morning, just enough to make this a bad hair day, but it is still too little, too late to make a difference in the crops this year. Continue Reading »
Do I have a sleep disorder? Well, I do have fairly odd sleep patterns, but I’m not sure if I would classify them as a disorder. I would think that if something is a disorder then the condition would bother me or those who live with me. I’m not bothered at all, and those around me just roll their eyes. They’re used to it. They accept me for who I am, odd habits and all. Continue Reading »
Now that there isn’t so much weighing on my mind, I am finding myself observing more of the world that goes on around me. I suppose you could say that my focus has switched from internal, or immediate, to that of the larger world.
When I got to the office today, I logged into Facebook. I am the admin for two pages, and I always check to see if there are comments that require a response, or to make sure, Heaven forbid, nothing horrible, graphic, or lewd has been placed on either page. As I scrolled down the news feed, I saw the following picture.
It made me laugh, simply because of the foolishness of the statement. “Put politicians on minimum wage.” Yeah, that would teach them! How ridiculous! Now, I am no big fan of politicians, but I do know quite of few of them on a personal level. Across the board, they are well-educated and highly experienced. Generally, the politicians I know have had very successful careers in the private sector before embarking on their political careers. While you may not like politicians, the point I am trying to make is they have WORKED to get where they are. They have paid for, and done the work required, to obtain their education and their success. Sure, let’s pay them minimum wage. Do you really think anyone with education or intelligence would go into politics if they were only going to make minimum wage? NO! Paying politicians minimum wage would only ensure that the doofus who flips your burger at McDonald’s could be your next mayor, or senator, or heck…he could be our next president! I am NOT criticizing McDonald’s employees or those who earn minimum wage. Minimum wage is an entry-level wage or a wage designed for teenagers. As adults, we should aspire for more, and we should certainly expect those who hold political positions to aspire for more.
At lunchtime, I headed out to McDonald’s. When I pulled around to the drive-up window, I was taken aback by the girl who stood there waiting to take my money. It’s just a regular Monday afternoon in February, and this girl looked like she was ready to head out for trick or treats.
Does she wonder why the only job she can get pays minimum wage? Would you hire a girl with bright red hair and scary eyes to represent your successful business? Oh, but if we pay politicians minimum wage, then maybe she could be our next governor! I’ll bet she would liven things up at the governor’s mansion.
After McDonald’s, I headed over to pick up a few things at Walgreen’s. I bought some new nail polish (my new obsession) and some candy for my dish at the office. I noticed a guy who seemed to always end up in close proximity to wherever I was standing. When I headed to check out, so did he. I kept ignoring him, until he tapped me on the shoulder. “Excuse me, but I have to tell you how much I like your boots. Are they hard to walk in?” I told him that there weren’t, I suppose that the ankle support helped. He asked me if I had “practiced” walking in them, and I said, “NO! I just walk!” He said that it looked like I had practiced, because I did such a great job of walking in them. My God…I’ve been walking for years, and this is the first time anyone has ever told me that I did a “good job.” He asked me if they were leather, and told me once again how much he liked my boots.
I could never really figure out if this guy was hitting on me, or whether he was one of those guys who obsessed over women’s’ shoes, or in this case, boots.
I headed up the hill and back to my office. I made one more stop to pick up a Super Big Gulp of Pepsi to get me through the rest of the afternoon. I filled up my cup, still giggling over the Boot Guy. I walked over to pay for my purchase, and looked up at the cashier. One look, and I shuddered. She had a pierced nose with a black post stud. It looked like a giant blackhead! I imagined that if it were really a blackhead, it would be a most-satisfactory squeeze! It made me shudder to think of a huge blackhead, but also, I can’t imagine what the OTHER side of that nose ring must look like in there!
Once again, I thought about why this person was working at 7-11. Wonder if the nose ring (and the rest of her scary appearance) had anything to do with her working a minimum wage job?
There was a girl standing next to the nose ring girl, another 7-11 employee. She was on what was obviously a personal phone call. She wasn’t too happy with whoever was on the other end of the line, and she didn’t have any qualms at all about liberally spewing the f-word as she stood behind the counter ignoring customers. She was intensely wrapped up in the drama of the conversation. I assume she had been “done wrong” by some man. I stood there staring. Yep, I couldn’t stop. I wasn’t paying attention to what she was saying, but instead, I was looking at some of the wildest fingernails I have ever seen. They were long, and purple, and yellow.
I felt like a nerdy old woman as I drove back to the office. I have on a tweed skirt and a black sweater. My hair isn’t brightly colored, and I don’t have any unusual piercings. My nails are a demure, muted shade called “Mink.”
Of course, I do have on my hooker boots! 🙂
I’ve made a decision. I’m going to deactivate my Facebook account for the entire month of December. For those of you who are my friends on Facebook, you’ll know that this will be a shock to my system. I am a FB junkie. I update my status several times each day. (It’s a great way of venting…or cheering!) Some days, I update my status MANY times. I use Facebook on my cell phone, at work, and at home. While I don’t necessarily spend a great deal of time on Facebook, I frequently check in to see what’s going on. I check Facebook in my office, while I shop, while I drive, before I go to bed, when I wake up in the morning, and numerous times throughout the day.
I have enjoyed reconnecting with old classmates on Facebook. A group of us have begun meeting for dinner or drinks occasionally, and it has been fun to catch up and revive old friendships. Facebook has been a good networking tool for my career as well. I have deepened what would have been only surface work relationships by getting to know my colleagues as friends on Facebook.
On the other hand, I have encountered old “friends” who have attempted to take a Facebook friendship to another level. Those guys have quickly been unfriended. Then there are the people who are so “MY LIFE IS WONDERFUL” that it makes me sick when I know that the reality of their lives is far from what they portray on Facebook. Others use Facebook as a political or religious platform. I don’t unfriend those folks, but I don’t read a darn thing that they write, either.
I will miss keeping up with all of the various activities that my boys post on Facebook. I suppose that I will have to email them or call them more often. T has a Facebook account, and he can share any interesting pictures that the boys post. Lord knows, I won’t miss seeing the college dorm party pics!
I’ll miss playing Bubble Witch Saga. I’ll miss playing Bingo. I’ll miss the quirky funny posts. I’ll miss the jokes. I’ll miss knowing every move that every one of my friends is making. I’m very nosy, and Facebook is a fine outlet for us creepers!
Obviously I enjoy Facebook, so why would I impose this hiatus upon myself? Recently I have been thinking about the amount of time I spend “plugged in” to my computer or phones. What in the world did I do before I had this obsession? What did any of us do before Facebook, computers, and cell phones? I don’t know what any of you did, but I once did a lot of things that I no longer do. I read books. I owned a loom and wove rugs. One winter, T and I learned how to paint with watercolors. I played the piano, or the clarinet, or the saxophone. Sometimes, I talked to real people face to face! I baked bread, pies, cookies, and cakes. I had sex! I exercised. There was a whole world of things that I once did without being connected to an electronic device. For one month, beginning on December 1, I am going to see if I can get back to basics once again.